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You know you don’t drive BMW E36 when … Funny!

3rd November 2007

You know you don’t drive BMW E36 when … Funny!

posted in fun, Uncategorized |


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Hey friends, I have found a thread on bimmerforums with this question "You know you DON’T drive an e36 when" and this thread received some very funny responses that I thought you have to see it. It’s really funny and true at the same time. If you think that some of these are not true, then maybe you’re not driving your BMW E36 the way you should. I suggest you go and have a BMW E36 driving course … Enjoy

You know you DON’T drive an e36 when:
…You meet the minimum balance requirement on your checking account.
…You don’t have any “check” lights on in your car.
…You haven’t been checked out by a chick while driving.
…You have a house.
…You only have one car year round.
…You don’t have any speeding tickets.
…You have a solid relationship with a girl, and they say you DO give them enough attention.
…when you know you can drive further because gas mileage is so much better.
…when you are not afraid to put down the windows and have it break on you all the time.
…when you aren’t afraid of constant minor problems.
…when you get tired of driving after an hour.
…you get a good nights sleep every night because your not up till 4am fixing your car.
…when you drive an e46.
…Your headliner doesn’t sag.
…You can open the door with the least amount of effort.
…There’s no blue and white badge at the front.
…A power window switch doesn’t cost $100.
…when you press the “Window Up” button, and the window goes up.
…when you go over a bump and don’t hear SQEAKRATTLESHAKEBANGCRASHSQEAKRATTLE.
…when you park your car and walk away from it without looking back at it and thinking to yourself “****ing sexy…”
…when you drive with the top down through less-than-fortunate neighborhoods and don’t get flipped off.
…when you pull up to someone else with an E36 and they acknowledge you, instead of looking down or to the side pretending to not notice you.
…when you cut a hard turn and your car flips over.
…when you cut a hard turn and your ball joint breaks.
…when you go to a repair shop and don’t have to be escorted out by ambulance due to heart attack.
…when you can afford more than one new mod/repair a month.
…when people don’t chuck crescent wrenches at you when you drive by (yeah, uh huh, happened).
…when you have angel eyes/projectors and other E3 owners don’t look at them like “OMG I never knew that was an option!”.
…when you fill up for less than $50.
…when an oil change is <$20.

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There are currently 7 responses to “You know you don’t drive BMW E36 when … Funny!”

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  1. 1 On November 3rd, 2007, ricky said:

    idk, my oil changes are like 25 bucks since i do it myself
    my headliner doesn’t sag….. yet, hopefully not
    i paid 20 for 2 power window switches (came from a e34)
    i dont have any speeding tickets (on record that is, my moms bf is a lawyer, yay)
    and ive only heard SQEAKRATTLESHAKEBANGCRASHSQEAKRATTLE once and after that time i stay the HELL away from speedbumps (broke my heart that sound did)

  2. 2 On November 20th, 2007, 4InPWR said:

    lol this is jokes, it seems to be very true with a lot of these things!i’ve even had trouble with my windows before i would hit to go up and it would end up like going down and opening my sunroof or the other window or closing it just weird shit like that or sometimes it just wouldn’t do anything!

  3. 3 On November 20th, 2007, Tony Sticks said:

    No kidding?! Does your sunroof open when you’re trying to open your window? I would pay to see that. Can you have a video for that LOOOL! I will publish it here.

  4. 4 On November 20th, 2007, 4InPWR said:

    lol it happens at very random times, sometime when i start the car sometimes when im driving and only once in a while, also not too long ago while driving my traction control and abs lights came on randomly. cycled the key but nothing happened so i said whatever il just take it to my local bmw dealership as i know people who work there and i have to pick up parts and cars almost every day from them so i became close enough with some key players there to get me some decent discounts n also i have a friend as a second year apprentice there. but they just went off again randomly. also today when i started my car after work the traction n abs came on but i cycled the key and after a minute of the cycle they went off :S really weird. as for windows n sunroof it only works all haywire for a minute n then goes back to normal so it’d be hard for me to catch a video of this.

  5. 5 On November 21st, 2007, Tony Sticks said:

    Man,

    Your car needs some serious work. Have you ever thought of selling it and buying another one with a better condition. In some occasions, I just prefer to go with this solution. It all depends of course on how annoying these things become with time. If you feel happy with your car then keep it and just keep working on it. It will heal with time. 😉

  6. 6 On November 21st, 2007, 4InPWR said:

    yeppp i have a couple friends that have e36s with a lot more body rust and they have shot ignition cyclinders n start their car with a screw driver and the other guys fan belt i think flew off and caused like 4 grand of damage under the hood, the other guys has got like fist sized holes in the rocket panels. It’s all little things that are not worth taking a huge chance on wether the next one is in better condition or not. Would it really hurt people that I’ve been thinking about e46 lately?

  7. 7 On November 21st, 2007, Tony Sticks said:

    LOOOL! Your car seems very good in comparison with your friends’ cars 🙂

    I don’t know about E46, but I imagine it will be very good too. It’s a BMW afterall.